Potty Training... a scary story

Everyone won't be able to handle this story... Read at your own risk.

Dads are lucky.
They get to be Dads.
They don't have to be Moms. Don't get me wrong, being a Mom is GREAT, it's just that sometimes it can be a dirty job.

Most Fathers I know need help changing a single poopy diaper. Their gag reflex flares up at the slightest glimpse (or smell) of soft poop or projectile vomiting. Sometimes they even expect you to feel sorry for them. They don't know how lucky they have it. Mom's don't get the luxury of "getting sick" when they have to change an explosive diaper or when they're being thrown up on.

I'm sure some of the Dad's reading this may feel like I'm painting a one-sided picture. So let me pause and say that this, of course, excludes those Stay-at-home and Single Dads. Also, I know today's Dads are much more hands on than the Dad's were 40, 30, even 10yrs ago. And that is very much appreciated. I mean my husband is what you would call "hands on"... But I'd be willing to bet that even most "hands on" Dads have no idea what it's like to be in the trenches taking grenades.

Like anyone else, Moms share stories with others who are in the same stage in life as they are, whatever that stage may be. For example Charlie just started school. Because of that I often share and listen to many stories about the good and bad that comes with my daughter being around a ton of other children (IE, friendships, fights, illness, and bad habits). Sierra is potty training. Similarly, I share and listen to stories about, you've got it, all the successes and non-successes that accompany it.

The following story is about Potty Training... and although I have clearance to share this story, names and genders will be withheld to protect the child's identity. After reading you'll understand why...

A while ago a fellow Mom was getting her older child ready for school when she was informed by her youngest that it was potty time. She placed her youngest on the potty seat in the bathroom, within earshot, and left the child there.

It should be noted that this was the first -and last- time the child had ever been left unsupervised on the potty seat. But Mom wasn't worried. The child was comfortable and as she continued getting the older kid ready she went in once or twice to check on her youngest. Mom could hear everything so she didn't feel any pressure to be in there watching. Instead she experienced one of those rare stress-free moments. But she was about to be in for a rude awakening.

When Mom realized that it had been a minute or two since she'd heard any tiny little grunts she grabbed a few baby wipes and went to check things out.

She was in no way prepared for the scene that awaited her.

I will take you through this scene exactly as it was told to me.

As Mom stood outside of the bathroom she sees Baby, standing up, looking down at the potty seat. Mom's eyes go to the potty seat. Poop is smeared all over it. Mom's eyes immediately dart to Baby's tiny little hand. It too is covered in poop. Mom screams Baby's name. Baby looks up at her... and Baby has poop on her mouth. Now I'm no mind reader but I can guarantee that this is every potty training Moms worst fear!!! Mom moves fast. She swoops Baby up, wipes Baby's hand with one baby wipe, drops it, wipes Baby's face with another, drops that one and turns on the sink with such speed that she said it seemed like it was all one movement... before she knows it Mom is drenching Baby w/ soap and water in the sink.

Fast forward 10minutes and everything, including the potty seat, is clean and Mom goes on to make breakfast for the kids. She even gets everyone to school on time...

In the words of the great Oprah Winfrey, here is what Mom knows for sure...
She knows that Baby had poop on his/her mouth.

She doesn't know that Baby had it in his/her mouth because a millisecond after said poop was spotted, Baby's mouth was filled with soap and water. But Mom's a smart lady and as much as she doesn't want to admit it, she knows chances are Baby ate a little poop. Which is why she also knows she will never again leave a child unattended on the Potty Seat.

So there you have it. There's a glimpse into what it's like to be a Mom on a not so good morning. Could Dad have handled that? I'm not so sure. From what I was told this particular Dad couldn't even handle hearing it over the phone.